Both Sides Now
by Aldura
Summary: Set during the Marauder's second year, James and Sirius are determined to discover Remus' secrets.


It was a busy day on Platform nine and three quarters as loads of luggage and students  
boarded Hogwarts Express. Amidst all of the commotion, no one noticed two twelve year  
old boys sitting on their trunks. James Potter quietly contemplated a strange light brown  
Bertie Bott's Every Flavour Bean while his best friend, Sirius Black, stood and craned his neck to see over the crowd. He nudged Sirius with his elbow.   
  
"What'd you say? Vomit? Caramel Creme?" Sirius eyed the candy suspiciously before  
picking it up and nibbling a piece off of the end.  
  
"Gravy." James hit his hand away as Sirius reached into the box for another. "James, I've  
eaten every bean you've pulled out of there for twenty minutes now! You minus well just  
give them to me."  
  
"That's not true!" James pulled a white bean out of the box, pausing just before it entered  
his mouth. "What'd you say this one is?" Sirius rolled his eyes before searching the crowd  
once more.  
  
"Honestly, how could you be in Gryffindor if you're not brave enough to eat an Every  
Flavour Bean?"  
  
"You'd be cautious too if you had a dung flavoured one!" James gathered his courage and  
slipped the bean onto his tongue. "Blech. . . salt. . . " Sirius laughed loudly, waving his  
hand wildly in the air as their other two best friends stepped onto Platform nine and three  
quarters.  
  
"Wait, wait, hold that face! Remus and Peter are almost here!"  
  
James slipped the box into his pocket and stood up to greet his friends. Sirius, Remus  
Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and himself were now entering their second year at Hogwarts  
School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. Their first year had been more than a little  
interesting; their little group seemed to have a talent for trouble -- not that any of them  
worked to avoid it. James grinned as Sirius not so subtly hinted about the present James'  
father had given him just before leaving the house that morning.  
  
"Show'em Jamie-boy, show'em the ithing,!"/i James shook his head.  
  
"Later. On the train." Peter hopped from one foot to another excitedly.  
  
"Come on, show us now! It's not fair that Sirius gets to see it and we don't."  
  
"Not now. It wouldn't be half so much fun if all of King's Cross knew I have an. . . "   
James looked around conspiratorially, ". . .i invisibility cloak."/i James grinned in  
delight, watching as two identical looks of shock wore off and the full weight of possibility  
set in. Sirius glanced at his trunk in longing, his dark blue eyes sparkling as he spoke.  
  
"Just think of the possibilities. . . Filch will never catch us out of bed again, Hagrid won't  
be able to keep us out of the forest, and we could go to Hogsmeade whenever we want!"  
  
"We have to be careful when to use it," Remus said, trying his best to be reasonable while  
wringing his hands together in anticipation. "Only for our best, most daring plans."   
  
Sirius groaned. "Don't be a prude! How can you think of rules at a time like this?"  
  
"Because if I don't, you'll have it confiscated before Halloween!"  
  
James made note a small patch of grayish hair behind Remus' left ear as they began to pull  
their trunks onto the train. Although he was rather thin and often sickly, Remus seemed  
to have the least amount of trouble pulling his trunk. James glanced at Sirius, easily the  
most muscular of the group, struggle along beside him.  
  
The four of them were often viewed as unlikely friends. James was often considered the  
leader, although this was mainly because he was the most visible of the group. He was the  
charmer, the people pleaser, the one with the plan. Sirius was the most outgoing; he was  
wild and reckless, and if Remus Lupin wasn't one of his best friends, would be in trouble  
every minute of his life. Remus, on the other hand, was quiet, controlled, and extremely  
secretive. While Sirius and James came up with the ideas for adventure, it was Remus  
who figured out how to pull them off with minimal risk of detention. The three of them  
got top marks in their classes. Peter was the odd one out in that respect. He had little  
talent and relied on his friends to help him through his courses. He was a nervous,  
worrisome boy who was ever ready to please his friends and teachers -- especially James,  
whom Peter viewed as some sort of hero.  
  
James held his hand out to stop his friends. Congregating a few feet ahead of them, a group of particularly nasty Slytherins lead by a sixth year student named Lucius Malfoy was employed in making a show of knocking over the trunk a Hufflepuff fourth year.  
  
"Move aside, Mudblood. This train isn't for parasites."   
  
"Leave him alone, Malfoy." James pulled out his wand, Sirius and Remus quickly  
following suit. Peter held his wand half out of his pocket, his pudgy hands trembling as he hid behind Remus.  
  
"What, do you think you little children are going to stop us?" Malfoy kicked a bottle of  
ink aside as the boy tried to refill her trunk. He grinned as his friends Crabbe and Goyle  
stood on either side of him like two oversized gorillas, as if to dare the young Gryffindors  
into action. The Slytherins laughed as they tread over the boy's clothing to board the train. James glared at them as he and the other three bent down to help pick up the boy's belongings. A first year girl picked up his cauldron and placed it carefully inside the trunk.  
  
"What was that about?"   
  
"Just a bunch of gits who don't like Muggle-borns," Sirius glowered.   
  
"You mean they do that to everyone who's got norm -- iMuggle/i parents?" The girl brushed her red hair behind her ears, staring behind her with wide green eyes.  
  
The Hufflepuff nodded, the tips of his ears red with anger. "It's best to avoid people like  
that, when you can. It's not a good time for Muggle borns these days. Especially with the  
Slytherins."  
  
It was true that the wizarding world was changing for the worse. An influential wizard  
who called himself Lord Voldemort was gaining power rapidly, gathering more and more supporters as time went by, and carrying an enormous distaste for Muggles and anyone who was connected with them. People who crave power and and had ambition seemed especially drawn the wizard, who was already beginning to display cruel, dictatorial tendencies. It was becoming dangerous to have a relation to Muggles, and those who did tried to hide it the best they could as Voldemort's presence began to loom ever closer.  
  
The girl stared at them with shock before bolting upright and scampering onto the train  
mumbling something that sounded suspiciously like, "They shouldn't be inviting Muggles  
to Hogwarts," over her shoulder. Remus patted the Hufflepuff on the shoulder.  
  
"Don't listen to her. When Voldemort is gone, everything is going to change."  
  
***  
  
"Lilitha Evans."  
  
James watched as the redhead from King's Cross was sorted into Slytherin. She  
approached the table cautiously, cowering slightly as a second year named Severus Snape  
thumped her unceremoniously on the back. "Looks like they've thrown another one to the  
werewolves."  
  
Remus twitched abruptly, knocking over the house Peter was building with Exploding  
Snap cards. Professor Figg's hand stopped mid-air, the Sorting Hat hovering above  
another first year.  
  
"Mr. Pettigrew, if you don't mind, this is a very important ceremony! Five points from  
Gryffindor!" The Slytherin table erupted into laughter as Peter sunk down low in his  
chair, wiping soot from his chin. Remus glanced down the table guiltily, apologizing to  
Peter and coaxing the chubby boy from under the table. Sirius shot a significant look at  
James. The term hadn't officially started and already their friend had that familiar,  
secretive look about him. To most people, Remus appeared calm and controlled, but  
James and Sirius could recognize the signs when their friend was hiding something.  
  
It was the same look that Remus got when he disappeared for a day or two every few  
weeks. Whenever any of the others questioned him about his absences, the boy would  
make excuses about being sick or having to visit relatives. Remus was normally very good  
in the face of exposure, but could easily be reduced to vaguely fumbled explanations when asked about it. James could tell that they were touching on something bigger than even Sirius could imagine.  
  
It was unnatural for someone to keep so many secrets from people who are supposed to  
be their best friends. It was very useful for Remus to be so composed, even when faced  
with Old McGonagall herself, but James and Sirius promised each other that this year they  
would find out what he was hiding.  
  
***  
  
"For Merlin's sake," Sirius groaned as he slid past a group of first year students, "It's like  
Slytherin Central in here! This is the last time I let you convince me to come to potions  
early, Remus." The other boy brushed his shaggy hair out of his deep brown eyes.  
  
"It's not so bad. We see them every day anyhow." Peter fell forward as Severus Snape  
pushed passed him. Remus dropped his bag, catching the smaller boy before he could fall  
to the stone floor.  
  
"I see that you Mudblood lovers are still fawning over your pet Squib." James pulled out  
his wand as the usual chatter shifted into a roar of laughter.  
  
"I wouldn't say that again if I were you, Snape. Everyone knows that you're useless with a  
wand."  
  
"I have no use for silly wand waving and incantations," Snape sneered, glowering down  
the bridge of his hooked nose. "Just as I have no use for silly Gryffindors who think  
themselves better than anyone else. Now go teach your Squib a new trick. iSome/i  
of us have more important things to do with our time."  
  
James let out a low growl as Snape stepped into the Potions lab. "Don't listen to him,  
Pete. He knows that he's not half the man you are." He looked over his shoulder just in  
time to see his friend scurry around the corner back towards Gryffindor Tower. Sirius  
shifted his weight uncomfortably.  
  
"Maybe we should let him blow off some steam. We could bring him some of those plum  
cakes he likes from the kitchens before Charms." Remus shook his head sadly.  
  
"Is everything about food with you?"  
  
"No, but it is with Peter." James grinned slightly at the remark.  
  
"Yeah, but put a bag of dung bombs in front of you and see how far you get without  
setting one off. We know all of your quirks too, mate."  
  
"Speaking of quirks. . . " Remus exchanged a glance with Sirius before they both replied,  
"Quidditch!" James laughed heartily, looking back for Peter once more before walking  
towards the classroom. Remus stopped just short of the door as a small hand grabbed the  
sleeve of his robe. Sirius glared at Lily Evans as she shifted nervously from foot to foot.  
  
"What do you want?"   
  
She flinched at the harsh tone of his voice, her lower lip quivering as she thrust a text book into Remus' hands and quickly mumbled, "You dropped this." Remus opened his mouth as if to say something, but the young Slytherin dashed down the corridor before he could make a sound. He sighed deeply as they stepped up to their usual seats.  
  
"You didn't have to be so mean to her. She hasn't done anything to anybody." Sirius tried  
unsuccessfully to hide a look of guilt as he shrugged nonchalantly.  
  
"She's a Slytherin. Who knew that she could be decent at the same time?"  
  
***  
  
The following Saturday, James, Peter, and Sirius sat around Remus' trunk. It was early,  
almost too early to be awake on the week end, and Remus had yet to be seen since dinner  
the day before. James reached towards the latch, only to pull his hand away at the last  
second before contact.  
  
"I don't know, Sirius. It just feels wrong. How would you feel if someone went through  
your things?"  
  
"We aren't just anyone, James. We're his best friends. What if Remus is in trouble? How  
can we help him if he won't tell us what's wrong?" Sirius raised his arm slightly, his  
fingers hovering in front of the bronze clasp. He glanced at Peter out of the corner of his  
eye. "You would want us to find out if something was wrong, wouldn't you?" Peter bit  
his lower lip, looking at James with pleading eyes.  
  
"I don't know. What if we get caught?" All debates flew out the window as the door of  
the dormitory opened and they all leapt away from the trunk guiltily. James breathed a  
sigh of relief when two third year students, Rowan Clark and Elie Goldberg, clambered  
into the room.  
  
"Oi, there you are! Breakfast is nearly over. Remus was getting worried."  
  
"Remus?!? Where is he?"   
  
"He went to the library to do a Herbology assignment." James ran over to his trunk and  
removed a bulky paper package, motioning for Sirius and Peter to follow. When the dorm  
door shut closed behind them, James ripped open the paper and pulled out his invisibility  
cloak for the first time. Peter gaped at the silvery material.  
  
"Wow, James. . . Do we really need to wear the invisibility cloak to breakfast?" Sirius  
rolled his eyes.  
  
"iNo/i, Peter, don't be daft! We're going to find Remus."  
  
"But what about breakfast?" James threw the cloak around Sirius and himself.  
  
"You can go if you want. We'll be in the library." They barely went three steps before  
Peter bolted past them.  
  
"James! James, wait for me! Let me in, I'm coming!" Sirius placed a restraining hand on  
James' shoulder.  
  
"Let him go. He'll get us caught for sure." James nodded in agreement as Peter slipped down the last three stairs and fell into the common room.  
  
***  
  
"Oh, please James, let's curse him a bit! Just this once."   
  
"Leave Snape alone, Sirius. We have more important things to do." Sirius groaned as  
they neared Snape and Lily. The former held a piece of parchment over  
latter's head, laughing maliciously as she tried to reach it.  
  
"But Jaaames, look at him! He can't even be nice to a iSlytherin/i! He deserves to  
get cursed!" James shook his head and elbowed his friend in the ribs.  
  
"No, now hush up!" James steered them to the opposite side of the nearly deserted  
hallway as Snape and Lily's voices became audible.  
  
"I think that our house mates have a right to know the truth about you, Evans. I think  
they would be very interested to hear what your sister has to say to you." Sirius growled  
at the look of superiority on Snape's face as the redhead broke down into tears.  
  
"Oh please, Severus, don't tell! I promise, I'll do anything! Anything you want! Just give  
back my letter, please!" Lily reached for the paper again in vain, barely able to keep  
her balance as the tall boy pushed her away from himself.  
  
"Maybe I'll just hold onto this. Who knows, it may come in handy someday."  
  
James and Sirius slipped quietly around the corner as the girl slid down to the floor.  
  
"Maybe we should have helped her."  
  
"Maybe. . . Even a Slytherin doesn't deserve to be treated like that." James looked at  
Sirius out of the corner of his eye, remembering the desperation in Lily's voice and her  
kind gesture outside of Potions.  
  
"Next time, I'll let you curse him." The two boys walked in silence through the school  
before pausing as the echo of footsteps sounded themselves from somewhere down the hall. Remus appeared from around a corner, swamped by a stack of thick books. James could feel a smile growing on his best friend's face as Remus nearly lost balance of his unsteady load.  
  
"Want to have a bit of fun?" James nodded as they began to close in on their friend.   
When they got within reach, James extended his arm and knocked a book onto the floor.   
Remus' head appeared around the rest of the stack.  
  
"Peeves?"  
  
When Remus found the hall to be empty, he heaved the books onto one arm and bend  
down to pick up their fallen counterpart. Sirius grinned impishly at James before reaching out and pulling the top few books inside the cloak. Remus looked up in annoyance to find his supply of library material shortened.   
  
"Bloody hell. . . " He looked around the hall again, sniffing audibly before stopping to  
squint at the spot where the other two boys stood silently under the cloak. "James?   
Sirius?"   
  
Sirius nearly dropped the books in astonishment. "How did you know we were here?" He  
threw off the cloak without a thought, the silvery material falling easily around their ankles. James hissed and shoved it under his school robes. Remus rolled his eyes and grinned.  
  
"Be careful, Sirius. You didn't even look for other people!" Sirius waved a hand  
nonchalantly.  
  
"Yeah, but how did you know it was us? We were hardly making a sound." The easy  
smile fell off of his face as Remus shrugged his shoulder and started down the hall.  
  
"I just figured that. . . I mean, Peeves would've threw the book at my head and. . . Well,  
who else is there?"  
  
James fell into step with Remus and tucked some of the books under his arm. Upon closer  
inspection, James could see dark bags under his friend's eyes and a slight slump to his  
posture that had nothing to do with the books. "You know, that doesn't really explain  
anything."   
  
Remus shrugged again, but didn't offer any other explanation.  
  
***  
  
Peter stayed put out with Sirius for the rest of the weekend for leaving him behind,  
although the boy couldn't quite bring himself to stay mad at James. After learning Cheering Charms the following week, Sirius cast charms on him for an entire day until Peter forgave him, but not before making him promise to measure all of his potions ingredients for the next week.  
  
Remus seemed to withdraw from his friends slightly, going on nightly visits to the highest  
tower of Hogwarts to practice Astronomy. He also seemed to take a liking to Lily Evans,  
who he made an effort to smile and greet whenever he past her in the halls. Lily almost  
never spoke, preferring to hide behind Snape, as she had started followed between classes  
carrying his text books. She seemed to avoid making friends, and barely lifted her head to  
acknowledge Remus' presence when he stopped to make the effort. James could scarcely  
imagine what it was that made his friend go out of his way to talk to Lily if she seemed so  
indifferent to his presence, but it somehow seemed like a natural course of action for the  
boy and was oddly comforting to watch. Whatever secrets Remus held, he would  
always be a person to love and admire.   
  
In the mean time, James and Sirius took up a new hobby; cataloging things about Remus  
that seemed strange in a journal. James spent two days researching the best spells to cast  
on the book so that no one would be able to read a word without their permission. Peter  
even knew a way to enchant the pages to hurl insults at anyone who tried to break into it,  
although he flat out refused to take part in writing the contents. After noting more than a  
month of occurrences and one disappearance, Remus Lupin seemed more of a mystery  
than ever.  
  
"Lets not forget that Dumbledore pulled Remus aside again today before Transfiguration. He never does that to anyone else unless something bad has happened, and he mostly does it around the time Remus disappears." James nodded in agreement, propping the book up on his pillow as Sirius leaned over his shoulder to watch.  
  
"Whatever is going on, the professors know about it."  
  
"Are you two done yet?" Peter whined from the door, staring at his bed in longing. "It's  
late and we're going to get in itrouble/i."  
  
"Just wait a moment, Pete, we're almost done. If James and I get caught, we won't tell  
anyone about the spell you gave us."  
  
"What spell?"  
  
Three pairs of eyes stared at Remus as he squeezed past Peter and kicked his shoes off  
beside his trunk. James closed the journal as Sirius quickly muttered the locking spell.   
Remus' eyes darted from one friend to another before landing on the book.  
  
"What, been caught red handed doing homework, have you?" Sirius puffed out his chest  
mockingly, only the slightest tension in his back indicating that something was amiss.  
  
"Never! We have nothing if not our pride!" He raised one black eyebrow as he studied the other boy. "In fact, you could be our first victim." He grabbed the quill out of James' tightly drawn fingers and passed the journal over to Remus. "Write something down. Anything."  
  
Remus examined the empty page with amusement before dipping the quill in ink. 'The  
pollination of Mandrakes should take place during early matura --'  
  
'Mr. Black says that you are a freak of nature, memorizing the textbook like that. What's  
wrong with you, man?'  
  
'Mr. Potter agrees and says that a life might be required to cure all symptoms of  
Knowitallism.'  
  
Remus grinned widely as the words slowly faded from the page. "If you're thinking of  
slipping parchment into the professor's lounge, you might not want to use your real  
names." James propped himself up on one elbow casually, breathing a sigh of relief.  
  
"Yeah, well, this was just to see if we could do it."  
  
"Yeah," Sirius piped. "And anyway, we haven't found a way to give it that extra personal  
touch yet. We've got to find a charm for it to recognize the people writing. It'll be a laugh  
to see what it says back to those drips when we slip some parchment into Slytherin's  
common room."  
  
"How are you planning on doing that?" Sirius rolled his eyes.  
  
"Jay's iinvisibility cloak/i, of course. Remus, even you have to agree that this is a  
good cause." Remus eyed Sirius for a moment, the latter holding his composure  
admirably under the other's penetrating stare.  
  
"You're hiding something."  
  
"Would I hide something from one of my best mates?" Remus bit his lip, either unable to  
think of a retort or unwilling to appear as a hypocrite. Sirius put on his most charming  
grin.  
  
"This will be our best prank yet, just you wait."  
  
***  
  
"Why did you have to do that? Break into Slytherin? What a fine mess this is." James  
grimaced as his potion turned blue instead of orange. "Bloody hell."  
  
"Jamesy, this is win iwin/i. One, we didn't get caught, and two, Remus didn't try to talk us out of it. We rule!" Sirius tilted a few drops of dragon's blood into his own cauldron, smirking smugly as the thick liquid took on the proper colour.  
  
"He still suspects something."  
  
"As long as he comes along on this next prank we'll be fine. You know he'll never come if  
he's really put out with us."  
  
A small bang erupted from Peter's cauldron as the boy dropped his ink well into the  
mixture. Professor Reiner, the potions master, rushed over and cast a concealment charm  
over the cauldron to confine the thick black smoke that was emitted into the room.  
  
"Well, it's not as if I'm surprised, Pettigrew. I almost began to believe that we might  
survive the term without you fouling up. Fifteen points from Gryffindor."  
  
The Slytherins grinned approvingly as their favourite professor returned to the front of the  
room. Peter was forced to share his cauldron with Genevieve Marx for the rest of the  
class, who gently insisted on doing all of the work by herself.   
  
By the end of class, Snape had put a charm on Peter so that the word 'squib' appeared in  
flashing letters on his forehead and Reiner had taken another five points from Gryffindor  
when Remus muttered the counter curse.  
  
"Stupid toss-up. What does he have against Gryffindors anyhow? I bet that Slytherins  
wouldn't be half bad if Reiner wasn't the head of their house." Lily glanced at Remus in  
confusion as he stormed down the hall without bothering to try and talk with her. James  
waved at her, smiling widely as a look of relief flashed across her green eyes before she  
ducked her head and turned to take Snape's books.  
  
"I dunno. Slytherins aren't half bad."  
  
They walked in silence towards Care of Magical Creatures. Remus threw the castle doors  
open with a bang, nearly hitting Hagrid's new watch dog, who was dubbed 'Fang,' on the  
rump. The gray pup barked at Remus, who barked back loudly in return. Fang yelped, scampering down the stairs in astonishment before trotting along beside the boy, trying to nip at his robes. Sirius struggled to keep pace with him.  
  
"Oi, Remus, do you want to calm down just a bit, mate? This isn't the first time you've  
lost points."  
  
Remus growled under his breath, but managed to slow down and collect his composure.   
"It's not the point. He shouldn't be able to treat people the way he treats people. Nobody  
should be able to treat people like they aren't anything at all. Peter is not a squib, and even  
squibs aren't worthless. They're just different."  
  
"I almost am a squib." Peter laughed shakily and buried his hands in his pockets. "I i  
would/i be useless if it weren't for you guys."  
  
"You're not a squib. Look at that brilliant spell you found. Just you wait until we break  
into Slytherin, then you'll see how useless you are." A smile finally broke out on Remus'  
face as anger faded into anticipation. James and Sirius shared a look of relief as Sirius  
threw a friendly arm around Remus' shoulder.  
  
"So you'll help us pull it off, then?"  
  
"Definitely."  
  
Remus remained in a thoughtful mood for the rest of the class, and was the only student  
who didn't complain when finding that class would only consist of de-gnoming Hagrid's  
pumpkin patch.  
  
***  
  
After a restless night in the dormitory, Remus continued to be ill-tempered towards Snape the next day. He didn't bother to restrain Sirius from putting an engorgement charm on the boy's hooked nose, and even managed to drop a dung bomb in his robe pocket after dinner and slip away again before it exploded. Neither the victim nor the other students in the Great Hall had seen who had planted the dung bomb. Even James, Sirius, and Peter, who had known of their friend's intentions beforehand, barely had time to see Remus at work before it was over and Snape was waving his robes around to try and rid himself of the rotten smell.   
  
An extra benefit arose from the prank; Snape grabbed his books from Lily and rushed to  
change his clothes, leaving the girl free to go and do whatever she desired. James could  
see a slight smile hidden beneath a mass of red hair as she practically skipped past them.  
  
"Hi, Lily."  
  
Lily waved to Remus behind her back before running up the stairs two at a time. Remus  
grinned at James. "I think she's beginning to like me." Peter struggled too keep a napkin  
full of small cakes from spilling onto the floor.  
  
"Why do you want to be friends with a girl who has a crush on Snape?" James gaped in  
indignation.  
  
"Lily doesn't fancy Snape!"  
  
"How do you figure? She tails him everywhere."   
  
Sirius grinned and poked James lightly in the ribs. James shook his head in warning and  
muttered, "Don't even," under his breath. James turned back to Peter and Remus as they  
used a hidden shortcut to Gryffindor Tower. "Snape has something on Lily. Sirius and I  
saw them together that night with the invisibility cloak. No one in their right mind would  
be attracted Snape, and Lily is one the top of students in her year."  
  
"What could Snape have against Lily?" Remus knitted his eyebrows together as they  
approached the Fat Lady. "She never bothers anyone. She doesn't even have any friends  
to bother anyone. Puffapod"  
  
The portrait swung open. James, Sirius, and Peter quickly stepped inside, but Remus  
remained where he was, holding his stomach. "I don't feel so well all of a sudden. I'm  
going to go down to the hospital wing."  
  
"Do you want us to go with you?" Sirius offered quickly. Remus shook his head just as  
readily, beginning to walk backwards down the hall.  
  
"There's no need. It's just a stomach ache. Nothing Madam Pomfrey can't handle. Why  
don't you three finish the spell while I'm gone?" Sirius nodded towards the staircase to  
their dorm as the thin boy trotted back down the staircase.  
  
"Cloak?" James nodded as Peter's beady eyes lit up.  
  
"Cloak."  
  
***  
  
"Peter, be careful! You have to walk iwith us or you'll fall out"  
  
"I'm trying! I just tripped over my shoelace!"  
  
"Will you keep your voice down! I hear something."  
  
They were only a few feet from the hospital wing door when James stopped in his tracks,  
stumbling forward as Peter knocked into him from behind. Professor Dumbledore stepped  
out of the room and looked expectantly down the corridor. The headmaster seemed to be able to see through the cloak, only a slight darting of his eyes suggesting that he could not.  
  
"Mr. Potter, Mr. Pettigrew, Mr. Black. This is not the time to be marauding around the  
castle." The headmaster's eyes sparkled as James pulled the cloak off and folded it carefully over his arm.  
  
"Sir, we only maraud when marauding is required. We're just here to see how Remus is  
feeling."  
  
"Mr. Lupin is fine, although Madam Pomfrey insists that no guests be admitted. Your  
fellow marauder will be with you in the morning."  
  
Sirius groaned lightly, but all three boys knew that Dumbledore had left no room for  
argument. They bade him good night before walking sullenly back to the tower. James  
knew that the journal would be opened tonight to document Remus' uncharacteristic  
temperament and the meeting with Dumbledore.  
  
***  
  
When James and Sirius dashed down to the hospital wing the next morning before  
breakfast, Madam Pomfrey hastily informed them that Remus had already left before  
shooing them away to remove warts and boils from a fifth year Ravenclaw and sixth year  
Slytherin. But when they arrived at the Great Hall, Peter was sitting alone before a large  
plate of pancakes.  
  
"Did you see Remus?" Peter asked through a mouthful of toast. "They made his favourite  
sausages." Sirius dropped down beside him.  
  
"He wasn't there. Sweet Merlin, I ihate/i this! This is daft!" James sat down sullenly and poked absently at a piece of omelet before scooping some onto his plate.  
  
"Maybe he just went back to the tower."  
  
"Maybe he's just pushing us away. Maybe he's not really our friend." James dropped his  
fork on the floor, everything in his being rejecting the idea.  
  
"Don't even say that! Of course he's our friend."  
  
"Friends don't lie to each other."  
  
"We'll be even better friends once he realizes that he doesn't ihave/i to lie to us.   
We'll be brothers." Sirius piled English muffins and breakfast sausages onto his plate as he  
stood to leave.  
  
"I'm going to go find him."  
  
"Don't do anything stupid, Sirius!" James watched his friend walk out of the door with a  
familiar brand of determination before turning towards Peter.  
  
"What do you think about this? Remus is still our friend, right?" Peter stared at his plate,  
as if concentrating on making himself disappear.  
  
"I think whatever you think, James."  
  
The boy wouldn't offer any other opinion, and James became increasingly nervous when  
the other two boys missed all of their morning classes. James rushed up the stairs before  
lunch and hurried past the Fat Lady with Peter at his heels.  
  
"Remus? Sirius?" James knocked lightly on the door before opening it and sticking his  
head through. The two boys were there, both participating in a stony, determined silence.   
Remus was lying on his side, facing away from Sirius, who was sitting beside him on his  
bed.   
  
"Are you going to come down to lunch?" Sirius shook his head.  
  
"I'm not going anywhere until he is." Remus sighed deeply, carefully hiding his face from  
the others.  
  
"I already told you, Sirius, I just want to sleep."  
  
"Then sleep, see if I care!" James opened his mouth to speak, but was quickly silenced  
with a dark glare from Sirius. "We all know that you lied about being sick last night  
anyhow."  
  
Remus shot off of the bed and limped towards the door. "You don't know anything about  
anything!" James just had time to see tears welling up behind his frustrated eyes before  
Remus left the room.  
  
The door closed with a resounding boom. After a moment of silence, Peter shuddered and  
sat down on his bed. "Remus is getting kind of scary these days."  
  
"He is not scary!" Sirius stood up and stalked towards the door. "He's a marauder, just  
like us, and we're going to help him even if it kills him!"  
  
***  
  
Remus and Sirius had forgotten about their argument by the next evening, both of them  
working on the spell tirelessly for the next two days.  
  
"James, Peter, wake up! Remus has done it!"  
  
"Oh, sod off. . . " James groaned as a piece of parchment landed on his face and two  
bodies flopped down at the foot of his bed.  
  
"Here, James, read this. Come on, put you're specks on already!" James grabbed his  
glasses from off his night table and flattened the paper on his legs.  
  
'Zonko's is the best place on Earth, or any other planet for that matter.'  
  
'Mr. Lupin says that if Mr. Black would stop to think of the important things instead of  
only jokes and pranks, he wouldn't have had the longest detention record for his year, the  
dumb git.'  
  
Sirius grinned ecstatically, completely unfazed by the insult. "James, isn't it brilliant!?!   
Touch it with your wand. Come on, hurry!" James reached for his wand and touched it  
to the page.  
  
'Mr. Lupin suggests that Mr. Potter should charm his teeth again, as his breath is making  
the paper curl.'  
  
Peter laughed as he read the letters over his shoulder. James passed Remus the  
parchment. "Here, you give it a try."  
  
The excitement on his face quickly melted into a blank calm as Remus recoiled from his  
hand. He smiled again, only this time, it never reached his eyes. "Maybe later. Give it to  
Peter."  
  
Peter took the parchment and walked to a pile of laundry on the floor, pulling his wand  
out of an dirty robe. His hand wavered slightly as he poked the page gingerly. Peter's  
eyes widened slightly before he folded the parchment twice and placed it in his pocket.  
  
"It works."   
  
"Come on, Petey, give us a look." Sirius' grin turned to something between devilish and  
maniacal as he stood up and advanced on the smaller boy. Peter shrieked as Sirius chased  
him around the room and out the door.  
  
"Should we go stop them?" Remus asked, chuckling lightly. James shook his head and  
sunk down into his pillow.  
  
"They'll be fine as long as they don't wake any prefects."  
  
Once James was sure that Remus had gone to bed, he pulled out the journal and wrote in  
the password.  
  
'Remus refuses to write on enchanted parchment. Is he afraid of what it will say?'  
  
***  
  
The four friends whom Sirius insisted on calling 'the Marauders,' a name much owed to  
the headmaster himself, skulked silently behind a sixth year Slytherin, Narcissa Blair.   
Students from separate houses never shared the location of their dormitories, and James  
was positively shaking in anticipation to view the Slytherin Dungeon.  
  
Narcissa was walking slowly, much to her follower's chagrin. Remus had devised a plan  
of attack on the Slytherins; they would follow a student to their portrait hole and, when  
practically every student from the school was at the Quidditch match between Hufflepuff  
and Ravenclaw, they would fill their dormitory with the freshly charmed parchment.   
James was absolutely livid about missing the game, but Remus insisted that it would be the  
most logical time to break into enemy territory.  
  
Narcissa stopped in front of a portrait of a tall old man with ruffled dress robes. "Pure  
bloodline."  
  
Sirius threw off the invisibility cloak once the portrait closed behind her, pretending to gag  
in disgust. "Well, doesn't that just figure? Any bonehead would be able to guess that  
password." James nodded in agreement, staring at the portrait in a vain attempt to see  
past it.  
  
"Why don't we go down? I mean, we've already come all this way." Peter shook his head  
nervously, staring down the hall as if Professor Reiner was about to rush towards them  
and give them detention for every single night for the rest of their lives.  
  
"We'll get caught. If my mum gets another letter from the school, she'll send me a howler  
for sure! She's still mad about the time I melted a hole through the floor of the potions  
lab."  
  
"I say we wait until later. They'll be leaving for the match in an hour."  
  
"Don't even mention the match around me, Lupin." James glared at Remus, who grinned  
smugly, as if he had chose this day for another reason aside from logic. "If it weren't for  
you, we'd be able to watch." Sirius nudged James with his elbow.  
  
"It's not like you're on the team, mate. It's not even Gryffindor playing."  
  
"Well, when I get on the team next year, you had better think of other plans than to miss a  
game!"  
  
Remus picked up the cloak, throwing it in the air and letting it float down over them.   
"You're not on the team yet, James. Until you are, it won't end the world for you to miss  
one match. Now let's go before you get us caught."  
  
James trudged sullenly beside his friends, nearly tripping over Peter's foot as he reached  
the stairway. They stopped abruptly as a group of Slytherins came down the stairs and  
stopped merely feet from where they were standing as Snape stood up on a chair. Lily  
was hanging on the sleeve of his robe, tears cascading down her cheeks as she pleaded  
with the greasy haired boy.  
  
"Severus, don't do this! I'm sorry I threw your scrolls into Moaning Myrtle's toilet! I'll be  
good, I swear!"  
  
Snape pushed her down onto the floor, and it was all James could do not to hex him into  
next week. Judging by the low growls on either side of him, Remus and Sirius' thoughts  
were clearly along the same lines as his own. Snape pulled a piece of parchment out of his  
robe pocket and cleared his throat with an exaggerated flourish.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please! I will now be reading a letter from Miss  
Petunia Evans to her sister, our own dear house mate." Snape ignored the redhead  
begging at his feet as he unfolded the page.  
  
"To Miss Lilitha Evans;  
  
I am only writing this because mother and father insisted that I should. Personally, I  
would rather just send all of your belongings and forget that you exist.   
  
You are a freak, a changeling switched for my real sister. Magic is not normal or proper,  
and I'm glad it's you and not me. I remember how happy you were when you got your  
letter, even though it was proof that you don't belong with us. Try to find someone to  
keep you while you are there, because we don't want you to come home. And you're  
wrong; I'm not sorry that I never got a letter, because I did get a letter from Dumblum  
himself absolutely begging me to come to your stupid school. I just didn't want to be like you.  
  
Your ex-sister,  
  
Petunia Evans."  
  
Snape grinned in satisfaction. "You see, Lily is a imudblood/i!"   
  
Silence filled the corridor. Suddenly, everything about Lily Evans began to make a scary  
sort of sense; her reaction at Platform nine and three quarters, her reluctance to make  
friends, the way she followed Snape around like a puppy. James shuddered to think of the  
terror Lily must have been living in since arriving at Hogwarts. The threat of exposure  
constantly looming over her head. . . and placing her in Slytherin! What was wrong with  
that blasted hat? James' fingers curled around his wand, the incantations to his best curses  
already grumbling low in his throat as the crowd burst into laughter and jeers.   
  
Lily grabbed her belongings from the floor and dashed up the stairs. Before anyone could  
react, Remus dove out of the cloak and followed her, putting jelly leg curses on any  
Slytherins who tried to do the same. In his haste, he nearly cursed Sirius, who followed  
close at his heels. Peter grabbed the ends of the cloak to make sure they were secure. No  
one seemed to notice that their friends had quite literally appeared out of thin air.  
  
James, and Peter stepped carefully around the group of students as they began to head  
out of the dungeons. Once the others were out of sight, they threw off the cloak and  
ran to find their friends and Lily.  
  
***  
  
After searching all of their favourite hide outs without success, James and Peter gave the  
password to the Fat Lady. It was a shock to see the common room packed with students  
so soon before the Quidditch match.  
  
"What do you want to do then? Just leave her to the Slytherins?" Sirius glared around the  
room while Lily huddled behind Remus. "You all know what they do to Muggle-borns.   
They'll eat her alive!" Remus, who was normally reserved with people other than his  
friends, nodded with conviction.  
  
"She's more one of us than she is one of them. If we do nothing, we'll be no better than  
they are. Arthur, I know you're on our side." Every head turned towards Arthur Weasley,  
a seventh year obsessed with everything Muggle. He shrugged nervously and smiled  
sheepishly around the crowd.  
  
"It won't hurt anyone to ask Dumbledore for a transfer. It wouldn't be right to let a  
Muggle live with wankers like that."  
  
More and more students began voicing their opinions and, although some were still wary  
of letting a Slytherin into the tower, most came to accept the idea after the commotion of  
the situation wore off. A group of first year girls took Lily upstairs to their dormitory to  
get cleaned up while the other students began to filter quickly out of the room and  
towards the Quidditch pitch, the Gryffindor team rushing to get there on time and watch  
the two other team's every move. James made eye contact with Sirius and Remus and  
pointed towards the portrait. The two boys nodded in understanding and walked through  
the opening, grabbing two bookbags by the door on their way out. James and Peter caught up with them, the four Marauders turning away from their peers simultaneously and covered themselves with the cloak once they had rounded a corner.  
  
***  
  
The hallways were deserted all the way down to the dungeon. James grimaced when the  
faint cheers of students and professors alike filtered through the window of an open  
classroom, wishing with all his might that the game would last long after they finished with  
the Slytherin dorms. They stopped in front of the Slytherin's portrait and whispered the  
password. The Old Man seemed to be hard of hearing, and it took four tried before he looked around at the empty corridor in confusion, but opened up all the same.  
  
The common room was thankfully empty when the boys stepped into the room. James led  
the way to the boy's dormitories, determined to find Snape and Malfoy's beds before  
anyone arrived. He handed a stack of parchment to Peter.  
  
"Here, you and Remus plant this in the girl's dormitories. Sirius and I will take the boys."  
  
Sirius winked at Remus before following James into the first room. Instead of switching  
the enchanted parchment with those in the student's bags, he took out his wand and  
started casting spells on the pillows of those students whom he particularly despised.  
  
"Siri, what are you doing?" He grinned like it was Christmas and the Quidditch World  
Cup all in one day as he found his way to Snape's bed.  
  
"Instant scalping. How'd you like to see Snape tomorrow without that greasy slop he calls hair on his head?" He whispered the incantation, his wand sparking slightly. "Thought of it myself. Remus decided it'd be cruel to do it to every Slytherin, but we thought of a few that would deserve it. He also made me promise not to do it to the girls."  
  
James laughed gleefully, careful not to let his voice get too loud. "That's Remus for you.   
Very chivalrous."  
  
"No, not very. He's casting delayed shrinking spells on their socks. By lunch tomorrow,  
it'll be damn near impossible to get them off their feet." Sirius sighed glumly, a wistful  
look cast over his mischievous eyes. "I wanted to do their robes. . . "  
  
It took less than half an hour to switch all the parchment, and it was very good at that.   
The Quidditch match had been quite short, Hufflepuff quickly losing to Ravenclaw after  
their best beater, Ludo Bagman, was rendered unconscious by two bludgers at once. By  
the time the Marauders made it back to Gryffindor tower, the first students were starting  
to wander back into the common room. James quickly stashed his cloak away in his trunk  
and rushed downstairs in hopes of hearing a play by play account of the game. It was easy  
to trick Gryffindor's Quidditch captain, Frank Longbottom, into giving said account  
without the boy realizing that James hadn't been there at all. Although, it proved to do  
more harm than good. James found himself biting back a groan at every descriptive hand  
motion or sound effect, cursing Remus at every inflection of the other's voice.  
  
"I hear you're good with a quaffle, Potter," Frank said, breaking away at an excruciatingly  
exciting moment. "A lot of people thought you'd try out for the house team."  
  
James shrugged uncomfortably. "Maybe next year." It was true that before Hogwarts had  
let out for the summer, James had announced his intentions of playing Quidditch for the  
team to his year mates. It wasn't until he and Sirius started discussing Remus one  
afternoon in July that James realized how much more his friend's happiness meant to him  
than a sport. They promised each other that day not to lose focus on their goal; to find  
out why Remus keeps himself so secluded, to find out why he refused to let himself open  
up even to his best friends.  
  
James looked around for his friend. Remus sat in the corner closest to the fireplace with  
Lily, neither of them speaking, but each looking completely at ease with the other.   
Watching them sit together in a comfortable silence, James wondered if Lily was the only  
one who truely understood what it was like to be Remus Lupin.  
  
***  
  
The Slytherin students were much more quiet and subdued than usual the next day in  
Hogwarts as a portion of their students flocked in and out of the hospital wing to re-grow  
hair and remove socks. The loudest sounds anyone heard from any Slytherin until dinner  
were shouts of indignation while attempting to take class notes on the enchanted  
parchment.  
  
Sirius was in a perfectly jolly mood all day, not even scowling when Professor Figg  
assigned two feet of parchment on kelpies to be handed in at the end of the week for  
Defense Against Dark Arts or when Professor Reiner took extra points from him for being  
too happy to work.   
  
It seemed like the Marauders were not going to be caught until Professor Dumbledore  
called them into a spare classroom on their way to the library. James exchanged a look  
with his friends before following the headmaster inside. Dumbledore gave each of them a  
penetrating look as they sat down at the front row of desks.  
  
"It seems to me that Slytherin house has been having a collective bad day."   
  
James racked his brain for a way to get out of trouble, but with no avail. Dumbledore had  
a quality about him that made it seem like he could read your very thoughts. Lying to him  
would be as useless as it would be unthinkable.  
  
"A dormitory should be a place where the residing students feel safe from the persecution  
of others, wouldn't you agree, Mr. Pettigrew?"  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"A place that should be respected by those who live there. A place, Mr. Black, that one  
could expect other students to respect as well."  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"A dormitory should also be a place where a student feels that he has a certain amount of  
privacy and security, isn't that right, Mr. Lupin."  
  
"Yes, sir."  
  
"A student's ipersonal/i belongings, especially, should receive the proper amount of  
care by others as well, isn't that right, Mr. Potter?"  
  
Something about the way Dumbledore looked at him made James feel as if he knew about  
the private journal he and Sirius kept. The professor's blue eyes twinkled merrily as he  
alternated his gaze from one boy to the next.  
  
"I think it would be fascinating to hear more about this subject. Perhaps three feet worth  
each?"  
  
James swallowed a cry of protest while Peter whined lowly beside him.  
  
"Yes, Professor."  
  
After knowing Sirius since they were in nappies, James knew that his best mate was just  
now considering the breach of morality that was involved with last night's excursion.   
Sure, he would complain about the essay, but deep down Sirius would feel that it was well  
deserved. Remus looked positively ashamed and seemed very close to tears for the  
briefest of seconds. Dumbledore smiled kindly as he lead the boys out of the classroom.  
  
"And perhaps ten points to Gryffindor, for the compassion shown to Miss Evans. I think  
that you would be pleased to know that she has been resorted into Gryffindor."  
  
***  
  
The weeks went by quickly and, when Christmas break started to near, the students began  
to feel restless as they set their plans for the holidays. More students than ever chose to  
stay at Hogwarts, their parents feeling it better to keep them under the protection of  
Dumbledore for as long as possible while Voldemort was still a threat.  
  
The Marauders never visited the Slytherin Dungeon again, although gits like Snape and  
Malfoy made it very tempting. They still managed to get into their fair share of trouble  
without going back to the dormitory, never going a week without at least one of their  
number spending all night in detention.  
  
Lily seemed to fit in well with the other first year Gryffindors who, after a few days of  
initial distrust and suspicion, came to accept her as if she had been sorted into their house  
at the beginning of the year. She seemed to take to one girl especially, a curly haired  
brunette named Ellis Aitkins. But even with her newfound friendships, Lily still seemed to  
bear the emotional scars she acquired while living in Slytherin. James often found her  
sitting off by herself in the library or staring out into the frozen lake. There were many  
times when the girl seemed ready to leave the wizarding world altogether, but Lily seemed  
determined to prove herself to even the most hateful Slytherin.  
  
Remus spent time with Lily almost every moment he wasn't playing Exploding Snap with  
Sirius or helping Peter with his homework. They nearly never spoke, preferring to read  
compatibly with each other for hours on end. Being from different years and with Lily  
being so timid, the girl didn't form any tangible relationship with the other three boys; a  
fact that had James feeling increasingly jealous every time he went to find Remus only to  
find him sitting comfortably with her by the fire.  
  
Peter was among the students who left Hogwarts for Christmas, leaving just short of half  
of the entire student body behind. To everyone's surprise, Lily stayed behind, not wanting  
to miss any good experience the wizarding world had to offer.  
  
After two days without classes, Remus insisted that James and Sirius accompany him to  
the library and gather all of the material they would need to finish their holiday homework.  
  
"We've only just begun the holidays, Remus. Can't you leave off for a few more days?   
Everyone else is outside. Having fun. In the isnow/i." Sirius whined pitifully as  
Remus passed him a large book from the musty shelf.  
  
"If we wait until you are ready to start, we'll never be able to finish everything before  
Easter." Remus gave him a glare as he stepped off of the ladder. "And besides, the snow  
will still be there tomorrow."  
  
"You'll be too busy reading these blasted things to make use of it. You remember having  
fun outside, don't you?" The dark haired boy batted his eyelashes hopefully, his arms  
straining under the weight of the thick tomes.  
  
"You remember the six feet of parchment we have to write before break is over, don't  
you?" Remus shot back, taking the books easily and walking down the row. "It will be  
more fun if we don't have to worry about getting it all finished."  
  
"No, fun is fun. You don't need to be free from responsibility to do to have it."  
  
James walked into the next isle to find a good book on vampires as his two friends  
bickered back and forth. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Lily peering through the  
space between the shelves, a frayed book held up close to her face. One hand went to his  
hair seemingly on its on accord, trying fruitlessly to smooth down the ruffled black  
strands. A smile graced her lips momentarily as Remus and Sirius began hitting each other  
playfully with their bags. Lily slid with them down the shelves before skimming a page of  
her book. Her forehead wrinkled slightly as she turned the page, not noticing as James  
crept up behind her to sneak a peak over her shoulder. He was only able to read the title  
'Dark Curses and Ailments from Past to Present' at the top of the page before Lily yelped,  
sensing his presence behind her.  
  
"What are you doing here?" She demanded, turning in full to face him. Lily shoved the  
book behind her back guiltily, the tips of her ears burning red. It was quite fetching,  
really. James pulled a random book from above her head, smirking as her blush began to  
creep down over her cheeks and neck.  
  
"Just looking for a bit of reading." He quickly glanced at the cover. "The mating habits of  
grindylows are quite fascinating, really. What book have you got?"  
  
"None! I haven't any book." Lily's entire face turned as red as her hair as she began to  
walk backwards towards the librarian's desk.  
  
"Then what is that behind you're back?"  
  
"Nothing." James tilted his head and stepped closer to her. Lily jumped nervously, her  
eyes darting from side to side. Chewing on her lip, Lily's eyes landed directly on his own.   
"It's a diary. My diary. I. . . keep a diary for. . . things."  
  
"Thought of that too late, you liar." James reached behind her back. He grabbed the  
book, trying to pry it from Lily's fingers without hurting her when Remus and Sirius  
appeared from around the corner.  
  
"What do you got there, Jamie-boy?"  
  
Lily pulled the volume with all of her might, thrusting it behind her back as it slipped from  
James' fingers.   
  
"Just a book." The redhead smiled weakly as she sprinted out of the library. Remus'  
eyebrows knitted together as he watched Lily go.  
  
"What did you do to her?"  
  
James shot a significant look at Sirius before shrugging in a bewildered gesture to Remus.  
  
"Nothing, really. She's a strange one."  
  
***  
  
"There's something not quite right about the way she was acting, Siri. That book was  
from the restricted section. I think she knows something."  
  
"Something?" Sirius looked up from the flobberworms he was placing inside Professor  
Reiner's desk. "What, you mean something about Remus?"  
  
"Exactly." James placed a particularly slimy flobberworm into a pair of slippers that the  
professor liked to change into during class.  
  
"Why would Remus tell Lily something that he hasn't told us?"  
  
"I don't think he's told her a thing. She was ispying/i on him."   
  
"If Lily has read something important in one of those books, then we need to find out  
what it was." Sirius glanced at James. "Do you think she'll tell us what it is?"  
  
"No. I think our best bet is to get that book."  
  
"Well, then, I suppose a visit to the girl's dormitories is in order." Sirius wiped his hands  
on the front of his robes before stepping away from the desk, grinning widely. "There,  
that should do it. I'd like to see the look on Old Reiner's face when he opens this up."  
  
***  
  
That night, James used the invisibility cloak to sneak into the first year girl's dormitory.   
Trying his hardest to avoid looking at the girls sleeping in their four poster beds, he rifled  
through Lily's book bag. When he didn't find the text in the neatly organized contents, he  
searched under her bed and even in her trunk, but with no avail. Sirius and James  
searched the tower and the library for days, but 'Dark Curses and Ailments from Past to  
Present' was no where to be found. They even looked thorough books of a similar nature,  
but without finding anything of particular interest.  
  
The disappearance of the book, however, didn't stop the boys from enjoying Christmas.   
Sirius tore into his presents at the crack of dawn as usual, just barely waiting long enough  
for the other two to wake before doing so. Remus opened his gifts carefully and precisely,  
forming a neat pile of presents beside him. James himself wasted no time at all to open his  
presents, letting his gifts mingle with Sirius' all across the rug in his hurry to open, enjoy,  
and move on to the next present in turn.   
  
After breakfast, while Remus went to go find Lily and thank her for the Muggle  
microscope she gave him, his friends went to Gryffindor Tower to gather the pile of  
chocolate frogs Peter had sent them from home. Sirius eyed the corner of a book wedged  
in the crack of Lily's favourite chair and swiftly pulled out his wand.  
  
"We already tried there," James said as Sirius levitated the cushions for what seemed to  
be the thousandth time in days. 'Quidditch Through The Ages' fell onto the floor.   
  
"Well, it has to be somewhere. Why don't we just ask her for it?"   
  
"She'll never give it to us."  
  
"Why don't we ask Madam Cavell for it? We could say that we need it for an assignment,  
and then she'll have to ask for it back from Lily."  
  
"No librarian would trust us with a book from the restricted section without a letter from  
the Minister of Magic." James sighed in annoyance. "She had to have put it somewhere.   
We just have to ifind/i it."  
  
"How are we going to find it in a castle where every day stairways change where they  
lead, rooms change where they are positioned, statues and portraits need passwords to  
open, and Filch is at our heels every moment he can spare?" A wide smile spreads across  
the taller boy's face. "This is going to be fun." James nodded in agreement, smiling  
himself.  
  
"Yeah, it is."  
  
"What are you two still doing here?" Remus' head appeared through the portrait hole,  
snow caked in his shaggy brown hair. Cushions and notebooks fell to the ground instantly  
as two wand hands dropped in surprise. "You're going to miss all the fun. Outside. In  
the snow." He smirked at Sirius cheekily. "They've started enchanting snowballs without  
you!"  
  
Sirius' eyes brightened at that, nearly dragging James out the portrait hole while pushing  
his way through the portrait hole. "Why didn't you say something before? Really, what  
kind of friend are yo-"  
  
Sirius paused mid-sentence as a large chunk of snow fell from above the door frame,  
covering him completely before melting away into nothingness. Remus laughed gleefully  
as his wand disappeared inside his robes. Sirius stood in shock for a moment before a  
wicked grin etched itself across his face. "LUPIN! I'm going to slaughter you!"  
  
"In your dreams, Black!" With that, the two boys dashed down the corridor, James  
following close behind him. Later, much later, it would seem strange to the three friends  
that Professor McGonagall didn't say a word as they shot past her and two seventh years.  
  
In fact, it wasn't until the Christmas Feast that they noticed anything amiss at all. Arthur  
Weasley and a Ravenclaw named Molly Jones sat together away from the rest of the  
room, both decidedly pale and withdrawn. Even though they hadn't been good friends  
before hand, Arthur had one arm wrapped around the girl's trembling shoulders. Before  
the start of the meal, Professor Dumbledore stood up to speak to the students. For the  
first time in James' recollection, there was no undertone of happiness in his movements, no  
twinkle of humour in his eyes.  
  
"My friends, this day is traditionally a day of joy. Of peace and love." The headmaster  
paused as Molly sobbed loudly, Arthur pulled her closer against him as she wept. "Lord  
Voldemort has made his move. This afternoon, he and his group of colleagues attacked  
and murdered the fine and upstanding wizarding families of two of our own peers, as well  
as the families of five Muggle-born wizards. It seems that there is a war approaching, but  
I would ask that we do not discuss that today. For today, all I ask is that we bow our  
heads in prayer for those who have lost their lives, and the loved ones they left behind."  
  
James lowered his eyes to the table, a million thoughts rushing through his mind. To think  
that anyone, even Lord Voldemort, could be capable of such inhumanity. . . Glancing  
down at the rows of faces down the tables, some shocked and appalled, others  
disturbingly calm, it seemed that Dumbledore didn't have to ask for silence after all.   
Whether each individual's loyalty resided with the Ministry of Magic or Voldemort, the  
events of that day would always stand out in their minds for years to come. For better or  
worse, a war has come.  
  
***  
  
Students flocked back into Hogwarts even before Christmas break had ended. Terrified  
parents rushed their children inside the protection of the school grounds, and some took  
their younger children to other well protected places. The wizarding community was in  
uproar and the Ministry in a state of complete disarray. The world seemed to shift in an  
instant, and even the most familiar things became foreign to frightened eyes.  
  
More Muggle born students quickly decided leave Slytherin once they viewed how well a  
great number of their peers took the attacks. Andrew Val Jean became a Hufflepuff,  
Phillipe Young was resorted into Gryffindor, both Ilsa Weston and Anya Offred became  
Ravenclaws, and Ulysseus Jones left Hogwarts altogether. Molly Jones was the only other student who decided to leave Hogwarts as well.  
  
Even the relationships between the Marauders seemed to darken slightly. Peter became  
more determined than ever to cling to James, as if doing so would protect him from harm.   
Remus seemed to become quieter, more disturbed and introspective than before. Sirius  
became protective of his friends, and of Remus especially. He often gave up an evening of  
mischief to sit in the Astronomy Tower with his friend, staring silently at the sky until near  
morning. It seemed that Sirius was determined not to let Remus distance himself from the  
other Marauders. James could feel his dislike for the Slytherins grow as more and more of  
their number walked the halls with satisfied smirks. Their pranks on the other house took  
a slightly vindictive quality, and although they tried to keep it all in the name of fun, it was  
nearly spring before the Marauders didn't gain a detention for dueling Slytherins in the  
hallways at least every three days.  
  
Lily, never forgetting the fright and uneasiness she experienced while living in the  
Slytherin dungeons, threw herself into her schoolwork. Indeed, it seemed to be no less  
than an attack against ignorance as she spent every spare moment ravaging through  
ancient volumes, quickly becoming the cleverest witch in her year. Her old house mates  
noticed her new tendency to haunt the library and often stopped inside to bully her. James  
took it upon himself to make sure at least one of the Marauders were there with her in  
case there might be trouble, although Peter only agreed as long as he could call for James  
as opposed to helping her himself.  
  
James went down to the Great Hall for breakfast one Sunday morning completely alone.   
Remus was absent yet again the night before, this time to visit his sick mother. James and  
Sirius had nearly abandoned their quest to find out the secret their friend so preciously hid.   
After the attacks at Christmas and the turmoil that followed, Remus' disappearances  
seemed trivial. All that mattered was that he was alive and still their friend.  
  
Peter was in the hospital wing covered in boils Snape cursed on him, and Sirius had a full  
day of detention with Filch for pushing the aforementioned Slytherin's head through a trick  
stair and banishing his book bag into the Forbidden Forest. James smiled at the thought of  
Snape tugging frantically at his head, desperately trying to release himself from his  
confinement. Unfortunately, it was Professor Reiner who found him and awarded Sirius  
his detention. Although there wasn't any proof as to who planted the flobberworms inside his desk, Reiner had been much more willing to take points off of the Marauders since Christmas.  
  
James was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't notice Lily Evans approaching until  
she sat down beside him. Quickly trying in vain to flatten his tousled black hair, James  
opened his mouth to say something. The redhead silenced him quickly with a hard look.  
  
"I'm going to the library now. You're not going to follow me again, are you?" James put  
on his most convincing face, admiring the way Lily's face flushed lightly when she was  
annoyed.  
  
"I don't follow you." Lily rolled her eyes.  
  
"Yes, I'm sure that you go there to study." James shrugged sheepishly, trying to get and  
maintain a look of complete innocence. The green eyed girl beside him wasn't making it  
easy with the way she was staring impatiently at him.  
  
"You're not the only one with exams coming up."  
  
"I wasn't aware that you needed to be an expert of 'Martin Miggs the Mad Muggle' for  
transfiguration. Honestly, James, I can take care of myself. You don't have to baby me."  
  
"I'm not babying you. I just want to keep you from getting hurt," James said, giving up  
on all pretenses and trying to use logic. "A lot of those Slytherins are much more  
advanced than you."  
  
"Well, a lot are more advanced than iyou/i, James Potter. Everyone knows that it  
was you who put the leg locker curse on Lucius Malfoy when he was playing Quidditch,  
and he could curse you under the rug!"  
  
"He could not!"  
  
"He's four years ahead of you!"  
  
"He needs Crabbe and Goyle to hold his hand!"  
  
"It doesn't matter!" Lily waved her hands, either in submission or exasperation, it was yet  
to be seen. "The point is that I don't need you to hold imy/i hand! iI/i can take  
care of myself!"  
  
Before James could reply, a tawny school owl flew overhead, dropping a red envelope on  
Lily's lap. James cringed in sympathy as Lily picked up the envelope.  
  
"Oh no. . ." Lily glanced up at him as she began to open the flap.  
  
"What?"  
  
"It's a howler. Cover your ears." James vaguely wondered who could be sending Lily a  
howler, with her parents being Muggles, and clamped his hands over his own ears. A  
magically enhanced voice boomed across the great hall.  
  
"GO HOME, LILY, NOBODY WANTS YOU HERE! HOGWARTS IS FOR  
iREAL/i WIZARDS, NOT MUDBLOOD FREAKS LIKE YOU! YOUR GOING  
TO BE NEXT! YOU CAN'T HIDE FROM VOLDEMORT!"  
  
Lily dropped the envelope in surprise as it burst into flames. Students from every table  
stared at her, every other Muggle-born with equal shock and dismay as the receiver, and  
nearly every Wizard-born with similar looks on their faces. Only a group of Slytherin first  
years seemed completely unaffected, trying to hold back snickers as they concentrated on  
their porridge. Professor McGonagall stood up from her seat and started towards the  
Gryffindor table.  
  
After the initial shock wore off, Lily took one look at the multitude of eyes concentrated  
on her and ran out of the hall as quickly as physically possible. It was only a heartbeat  
before James followed her.  
  
Although she was not in the habit of running as was James, Lily overtook him with ease.   
She was outside of the castle and sitting beside the lake before James managed to catch up  
with her. He fell down beside her with a thump, and, before he could catch his breath, the  
redhead threw her arms around him. James patted her back awkwardly as Lily cried  
against his shoulder, pulling his robes in bunches between her tightly drawn fingers. James  
let out a breath he didn't even know he was holding as she pulled away, either of relief or  
disappointment. It was hard to keep track of anything he was feeling around her.  
  
"I'm going to get him, James! I'm going to beat Voldemort if it's the last thing I do, and  
then we'll see what they think of me!"  
  
And with a look of ambitious determination, Lily walked calmly back to the castle. James  
watched her retreating form until it was out of sight before he picked up her discarded  
book bag and followed after.  
  
***  
  
Although Lily had left the lake directly before him, James had quite a time finding her. He  
asked many a student in the corridors if they had seen her, but every tip seemed to lead to  
a dead end.   
  
James began to wonder if she had gone back to the tower, when he glanced over the  
railing of the staircase just in time to see Lily's head appear from behind a tapestry on the  
floor below. James began to call out to her, but something about the look on the  
redhead's face made him stop as Lily glanced around evasively before slipping through  
to another staircase.  
  
James glanced around himself, checking to make sure the girl was out of sight, and walked  
quickly to the tapestry. A woven dragon in the scenery eyed him sleepily before rolling  
over and falling back asleep. Slipping behind the cloth, James felt the wall for a loose  
brick or trick button, but with no prevail. Neither did any charms or spells affect the wall  
in the slightest. He was on the verge of giving up when footsteps began to echo around  
the corner and Reiner loudly scolded a student for loitering in the hallway. Not wanting to  
face being scolded himself, James flattened his back against the wall and willed the  
professor to pass on by without noticing the rather large lump in the tapestry.   
  
It took a moment to realize that his straining ears could hear no sounds from the hallways.   
James opened his eyes to find himself facing a stone wall. He had passed through to the  
other side into a room about half the size of a regular classroom. It was furnished with  
musty antique furniture, much older and more worn than any other in the school.   
Although there was a sorry looking bed and wardrobe, a desk against the wall looked like  
it had been recently cleaned, with new parchment and quills piled neatly on the corner.   
James absently wondered what the trick to the doorway was, but any thought was quickly  
banished as he noticed a pile of large books on the floor. The top one read 'Dark Curses  
and Ailments from Past to Present' on the cover. 'The Curse of the Bite; A Examination  
of Lycanthropy,' 'Two Faced - Lycanthropes and How to Deal with Them,' and  
'Werewolves, the Transformation of Men to Monsters' were stacked among the books  
underneath it.  
  
So this was Lily's secret project.  
  
James stared at the faded volumes in horror. It was impossible. It ihad/i to be!   
Sweet, shy Remus Lupin, a werewolf? The very thought of it was absolutely absurd!   
James forced himself to laugh at the very thought. It came out empty and hollow to his  
ears. Lily was probably doing an extra credit essay. She was the type to do that.   
Somewhere in his subconscious, events and facts about Remus began to fall into place  
with Professor Figg's lesson on werewolves, but James refused to acknowledge them. Not  
Remus. Anyone was more likely to be a dark creature than the brown haired boy was.  
  
A large astrological chart was posted on the wall, magically charmed to change constantly.   
Last night was the full moon.  
  
***  
  
James practically fell through the portrait hole, gasping for air as he quickly abandoned  
Lily's bag, which contained scrolls and scrolls of facts about werewolves that pertained to  
his secretive friend. "SIRIUS! PETER! Where are you?!?"  
  
"They're not back yet." Remus glanced up from the large scroll of parchment he was  
writing on, more than half of which fell over the end of the table. "Peter went to the  
kitchens, and Sirius is still polishing the silver in the trophy room."  
  
James stared at the other boy blankly while he flipped the page of a book by his side.   
Dark circles lay under Remus' eyes and his lip had clearly been split open at the side.   
Fading bruises could be seen on his jaw and around his wrist as Remus re-inked his quill.   
His fingers were scratched and slightly swollen at the tips. Madam Pomfrey had obviously  
done some work on the boy before he came back.  
  
"Did you need something?"   
  
James shook his head dumbly at the words and backed up through the portrait hole.   
Remus stood up to follow him, his eyebrows knitted in concern over his dark eyes. "James, are you all right, mate? You look like you're going to wretch."  
  
"I'm fine." James smiled half-heartedly. "Sorry I interrupted you.  
  
"Ja -- "  
  
James shut the portrait hole quickly and ran down the corridor towards the trophy room.   
He nearly tripped over Filch's cat, Mrs. Norris, as he rounded a corner, but was in too  
much of a panic to check his behaviour. Remus couldn't be a werewolf. He just couldn't!   
Sirius would never let him live it down when he told him the idea.  
  
"Siri!"  
  
James skidded to a halt in front of dark haired boy as he leaned over a large plaque resting  
on the floor. The latter looked up with startled blue eyes.  
  
"What are you doing here, James? Filch will catch you for sure!"  
  
"Sirius, this is important!" James glanced towards the door, making sure it had shut tight  
behind him. "Sirius, I found the book!"  
  
"You what?" A slow smile grew over his face as Sirius threw the polishing rag to the  
floor. "That's iFANTASTIC/i! Where was it? What was in it? You have to tell me  
ieverything/i!"  
  
James took a deep breath and quickly explained the events of the morning. "And then, I  
found a room I've never been to before, and there it was. Along with a pile of books  
about lycanthropy." Sirius' eyes widened in shock.  
  
"You mean werewolves?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"Lily thinks Remus is a werewolf?"  
  
"I think so." His friend's face broke out into a grin again as he stooped down to pick up  
the cloth again.  
  
"Don't be daft, James. Remus isn't a werewolf. Werewolves are evil, and blood thirsty,  
and crazy, and. . . He's just not like that." Sirius chewed his lower lip for a second, folding  
and unfolding the rag.  
  
"Although he idoes/i move faster than anyone else we know." James nodded in  
agreement.  
  
"He's stronger too."  
  
"Even though he's so thin and always sick."  
  
"He's sick about every month."  
  
"And he's always moody before he disappears."  
  
"And tired afterwards."  
  
James could practically see the thoughts swarming through the taller boy's mind. Sirius  
shook his head and began to attack the plaque with new vigor.  
  
"No, you're wrong. Remus couldn't be a werewolf." He looked at James with pleading  
eyes. "Could he?"  
  
"I think he could." The two Marauders sat in silence until Filch opened the door, Mrs.  
Norris scuttling in past him.  
  
"What are you doing here?" He shook his fist at James. "Be off with you, and leave the  
other one to his work."  
  
***  
  
If Sirius had been shocked by the idea of one of his best friends being a werewolf, Peter  
was positively horrified. It took a while for James to calm the chubby boy down, but  
nothing would calm him enough to even approach Gryffindor tower. Although James was  
interested in finding Remus and proving the theory wrong, at Peter's insistence, they  
wandered through the corridors together until dinner.  
  
Sirius waited for the two outside the Great Hall, peering in through the door as they came  
up behind him. He glanced over his shoulder, eyes wide with uncertainty as he worried at  
his lower lip.  
  
"He's in there. iEating/i."   
  
"iEating/i?" James rolled his eyes as Peter trembled beside him.  
  
"Well, of course he's eating! What else is he supposed to be doing?" Sirius made a face at  
James before looking back into the hall. Remus looked up from his plate at the same time,  
his face brightening at the sight of his friend. Sirius smiled in return before turning back  
out of the doorway.  
  
"What are we going to do? Should we pretend we never found anything?"  
  
"Siri, he's a iwerewolf/i!" Peter shuddered again, wrapping his arms around his chest  
as if to protect himself. "We should tell Professor Dumbledore."   
  
"But Dumbledore already knows." James tilted his head thoughtfully. "In fact, I'd wager  
that all of the professors know. Things can't be as bad as they seem." Sirius nodded in  
agreement.  
  
"Dumbledore would never put anyone of us in danger." Sirius gave Peter a pointed look.   
"We always said that Remus didn't have to hide secrets from us."  
  
"But that was before we knew what the secret iwas/i. We didn't know he was  
dangerous before."  
  
"He's not dangerous! Remus wouldn't hurt a fly and you know it, Peter!" James  
motioned for the other two boys to back away from the doorway as a group of  
Ravenclaws approached down the corridor. He opened the door of an empty closet and  
slipped inside, waiting until the door closed behind them before starting again.  
  
"Let's think about this rationally. Neither of us have ever felt threatened by Remus before,  
he's always been there to help us, no matter what, and none of the professors are worried  
enough about him to tell anyone that he's a werewolf."  
  
"So you want us to ignore the fact that he's a dark creature?" Peter shook his head in  
panic. "No. I won't do it! Not for anyone!"  
  
"Werewolf or no, he's still one of our best friends. I trust him with my life." Sirius  
folded his arms, his jaw protruding in stubborn determination. "You two can do what you  
like, but I'm going to dinner." James stopped him before he could open the door.  
  
"I'm coming too. I say we talk to him. Tonight, after curfew. We owe it to Remus to let  
him explain himself." The two black haired boys looked at their smaller friend, each with  
identical looks of expectation on their faces. Peter sighed loudly.  
  
"Fine."  
  
***  
  
Although each of the four Marauders did their best to keep up an appearance of normalcy,  
each knew in their own way that something was amiss between their small group. Peter  
was clearly still frightened of Remus, jumping whenever the brown haired boy ventured to  
talk to him. Sirius barely spoke a word, unconsciously staring at Remus for minutes on  
end with an unreadable expression on his face while James tried to keep the mood light by  
being overly peppy. For his part, Remus studied each of his friends in turn and became  
more and more uneasy until the meal ended.  
  
Remus stood abruptly, dropping his cutlery on his plate as he grabbed his bags. Peter fell  
back into Sirius and threw his arms over his head, startled by the suddenness of the other's  
movements.  
  
"Don't eat me!"  
  
A few students nearby turned towards the commotion as Remus stared at his friend in  
horror. A look of comprehension flashed across his eyes as he glanced at Sirius and James  
before sprinting out of the Great Hall. Sirius angrily shoved Peter off of him, struggling  
to get up off the bench.  
  
"Get up, you sod! We have to follow him!"  
  
James helped pull the blond boy to his feet before running out of the room for the second  
time that day. The three boys followed the sound of Remus' fading footsteps through the  
hallways until they reached the main entrance. Their friend was already half way to the  
Forbidden Forest once they stepped outside. Remus ignored James and Sirius as they  
called for him to stop, leaning down under the Whomping Willow. To their surprise,  
Remus had done something to make the branches stop swinging and disappeared from  
sight into a small space between the roots. By the time they reached the tree, it had  
resumed it's usual motion, giving each Peter and James nasty blows before the boys gave  
up trying to open the hole.  
  
"What are we going to do?" James kicked the ground in frustration. "He's getting away!"   
Sirius knelt down, examining the spot where Remus had disappeared.  
  
"There's got be a tunnel or something through here. It must lead into the forest." Sirius  
met James' eyes. "Remus has to come out somewhere. We have to look for him."  
  
"We can't go in the forest! There's all sorts of monsters in there!" Peter shivered as the  
other two boys stepped into the shadows.  
  
"Then don't come! We'll find him on our own."  
  
Although terrified at the thought of being left alone, Peter, for once, showed no indication  
of following James anywhere. With a grunt of disapproval, Sirius broke into a run, James  
pausing only long enough to light the end of his wand.  
  
James struggled to keep pace with Sirius, who's long legs helped maintain a larger step.   
Sirius, for his part, managed to trip and stumble over dozens of stones and roots before  
even thinking of lighting his own wand. Both boys were so preoccupied with their  
thoughts that neither noticed the creatures following them in the shadows.  
  
Yelling in fright, Sirius slipped on a patch of moss as a massive black monster stepped out  
of the trees directly in front of him. James promptly fell down beside him when his foot  
made contact with the taller boy's shoulder, a strong surge of panic preventing him from  
doing more than stare as eight beady eyes glinted in the fading sunlight that filtered  
thorough the branches.  
  
Before he could get a clear look at the creature looming over them, something grabbed  
James from behind. He screamed as he was carried away from the monster, the sound of  
hooves meeting the ground behind him. James struggled weakly for a bit, only to have a  
muscular arm encircle his waist to hold him still.  
  
"Jay, are you all right?" Sirius' voice barely registered as the blood pounded in his ears.   
James made a mental check of his body before answering.  
  
"I'm fine. You?"  
  
"Peachy."  
  
His saviour halted suddenly and quickly placed James on the ground in a heap. Fang  
leaped onto him, licking his face, neck, ears, and anything else he could reach as the boy  
rolled over.  
  
"Gerroff, you."  
  
Hagrid pulled the puppy off by the collar, a smile hidden behind a large, bushy beard.   
"Good of yer to find them." He nodded his head in greeting. "Polyta. Corbin."  
  
James turned behind him. Two centaurs stood over him and Sirius, who sat only a few  
feet away. A female with long brown hair nodded back as a peppered gray male extended  
his hand.  
  
"Greetings Hagrid."   
  
"We were happy to be of some help. Weren't we, Father?" Corbin rolled his eyes at this,  
but agreed all the same, mumbling something about being ridden like a common horse.  
  
"It's much appreciated, be assured." Hagrid motioned for James and Sirius to follow him.   
"Good day ter ya all."  
  
The centaurs were barely out of sight before the two friends began rambling on about the  
creature in the woods.  
  
"It was as tall as a house!"  
  
"And had dozens of eyes!"  
  
"And legs, too! Scores of them!"  
  
"And it was covered with fur!"  
  
"And had pinchers!"  
  
"Hagrid, what iwas/i it?"  
  
Hagrid laughed loudly as the reached his cabin. "Yer lucky to have made it back alive, ye  
were. Almost became supper, I imagine."  
  
Sirius' face momentarily brightened at the thought of the danger they avoided before  
sobering. "Hagrid, Remus is still out there! He opened a hole under the Whomping  
Willow. What if that ithing/i finds him too?"  
  
"Not to worry, Master Black. Young Lupin has already been brought back to the castle."   
Dumbledore appeared from behind them, his eyes twinkling in humour. "Mr. Pettigrew  
informed us of your disappearances the moment you left."  
  
"So he's all right?" James breathed a sigh of relief at Dumbledore's smile of assurance.  
  
"He's waiting for the three of you in my office as we speak."  
  
***  
  
Peter was waiting with Professor McGonagall when they reached the stairway to  
Dumbledore's office. He glanced apologetically at them as the headmaster gave the  
password. The Marauders followed him up the staircase, completely silent as each step brought them closer to their missing counterpart. Dumbledore stopped at the door of the office and smiled kindly.  
  
"I'll leave the four of you to settle your matters together." He patted Peter on the  
shoulder, who visibly relaxed at the gesture. "And remember that, amongst other things,  
Mr. Lupin is still just a boy. As you all are."  
  
With that, the headmaster made his way down the stairs. Sirius glared at Peter, who  
was smiling hopefully from one boy to the other.  
  
"You itold/i on us??? How could you?" James nodded in agreement as the blond  
boy's face fell.  
  
"iUn/iforgivable!"  
  
"Abominable!"  
  
"Disgusting!"  
  
"Sickening, really, saving our life like that."  
  
"The ultimate betrayal."  
  
Sirius and James paused their banter for a moment, waiting for the words to register to  
their friend. When Peter looked up in confusion, James laughed and thumped his back.  
  
"We owe you one, Pete. We wouldn't have made it out if it weren't for you."  
  
Sirius smirked as Peter sighed a breath of relief. "It seems like you're not rid of us yet, ol'  
chap."  
  
"Remus either." Peter glanced at the door. "They said he tried to run away tonight. He  
made it all the way past Hogsmeade before they caught up with him."  
  
"Past Hogsmeade?" Sirius whistled, clearly impressed with his friend. "Bugger all, how  
did he manage that?"  
  
James steeled himself to enter Dumbledore's office. "Want to go ask him?" Sirius  
nodded.  
  
"Pete?" Peter shifted on his feet a moment before raising his head decidedly.  
  
"It iis/i awfully impressive of him. Imagine making it all that way. I'd need a  
broomstick to go that quickly!"  
  
Crossing both his fingers and toes for luck, James pushed the door open. Dumbledore's  
office was large and round, with pictures of Hogwart's previous headmasters hanging on  
the wall. Remus sat in a chair next to Dumbledore's desk, a small scarlet and gold bird  
resting on his lap. All of the wounds that were there this afternoon had now faded away  
completely, leaving Remus looking like any other person who had a bad night's sleep.   
Before James could think of anything to say, Sirius pushed past him and ran across the  
room.  
  
"Remus!"   
  
Sirius threw his arms around his friend neck, drawing him up into a tight hug. The latter  
stood rigidly, looking very much overwhelmed and astonished, before returning the  
embrace in full. Remus closed his eyes tightly as tears of relief began to trail slowly down  
his cheeks. Sirius suddenly pushed the other boy away, pouting angrily.  
  
"So, that time in first year I beat you at arm wrestling, you just let me win, didn't you?"   
Remus open and closed his mouth soundlessly, the expression on his face closely  
resembling a deer in the headlights.  
  
"Well, maybe just a ilittle/i." Peter stepped forward with his hands on his hips.  
  
"And when we brought up all those cakes for you're birthday, you heard us before we  
could surprise you, didn't you?"  
  
"I iwas/i surprised, really. . . Just a little before I was supposed to be."  
  
"And when Sirius and I were under the cloak when you were coming from the library, you  
could smell us, couldn't you." James gave Remus a hard look as the latter struggled to  
hold back a smile.  
  
"Well, if you would just ibathe/i once in a while. . ."  
  
The four Marauders burst into laughter, unable to keep back the relief each felt at finding  
that their friendship remained no worse for wear. Later, much later, there would be  
explanations to be had. But for now, the resolute acceptance of best friends was all that  
anybody needed.  
  
***  
  
Dumbledore excused the boys from their classes the next day. Although Remus was  
horrified at the idea of missing so many lectures, he quickly submitted to his friends, who  
were all determined to know everything about his lycanthropy. Sirius was absolutely  
fascinated with every detail of the werewolf's life story, from the time he was bitten at the  
age of five to his secret house just outside of Hogsmeade where he went every full moon  
to transform. Peter was becoming increasingly more at ease with the idea, even venturing  
to ask a few questions about lycanthrope while they lounged about their dorm, sharing a  
stash of candy spread across James' bed.  
  
"The wolf wouldn't harm us, would it Remus? I mean, you'd recognize us, wouldn't you?"   
Remus looked away uncomfortably, poking at an imaginary piece of lint on the blanket.   
  
"The wolf doesn't recognize anybody. It's a monster. It thirsts for blood, wants it so  
desperately that it cannot think of anything else, and nobody is safe from that." He lifted  
the sleeve of his robe then, revealing the faint impression of teeth marks along his flesh.   
"Not even me."  
  
"The wolf attacks itself?" Sirius' fingers grazed along the indentations, an expression of  
morbid curiosity on his face. Remus nodded sadly.  
  
"It hungers so much, it becomes crazed, and any flesh is better than none at all. Anything  
to keep it from thinking about it's need for the hunt." He laughed bitterly, in a half-hearted  
attempt to disguise his misery and self-loathing. "Although, one time, my pet puffskein  
was accidentally locked in the room with the wolf, and it rolled Jerry around the room all  
night."  
  
James smiled lightly and patted the other boy's shoulder. "I suppose even the wolf needs a  
friend."  
  
Remus pulled away suddenly and stood up over the bed. "No, it doesn't!" He looked  
pleadingly from one boy to another. "You have to promise me that you won't try to  
approach the wolf. That you won't ever try to open the willow during the full moon."  
  
"I promise." James nudged Peter and Sirius, who were both to startled at their friend's  
outburst to do anything but stare open-mouthed at him. "We won't ever open the willow  
when your transformed."  
  
"We won't go near the willow when the wolf is out." Peter said with conviction. Three  
Marauders looked expectantly at their silent fourth. Sirius' brow was knit together in  
concentration; an expression that, given the circumstances, was a very unsettling thing.  
  
"Sirius?" His name came out as little more than a whine as Remus stared desperately into  
the boy's dark blue eyes. "Please, promise me you won't do anything. I couldn't bear it if the wolf attacked any one. I don't want to hurt anybody, iever/i."  
  
"Do you think I'd ever put anyone at risk like that?"  
  
Remus balled his hands into white knuckled fists at Sirius' slightly wounded look.   
"iSiri/i, don't change the subject!" The latter nodded in submission, easing the  
tension slightly with a charming grin.  
  
"I promise I'll never give the wolf a chance to hurt anybody."  
  
Remus apparently decided that this was an acceptable answer, and didn't say another word  
about it. Later, when James asked him why he didn't press the subject, Remus simply  
answered, "Sirius doesn't make promises he can't keep."  
  
***  
  
It was a silent knowledge between the Marauders that they would have to approach Lily  
about Remus' lycanthropy, but neither boy wanted to bring the subject into the open.   
Remus, especially, needed some time to come to terms with having his condition being  
common knowledge amongst his closest friends after spending so much time and energy  
striving to conceal it. Even though he knew that he could speak openly about the wolf,  
Remus couldn't quite help but avoid the subject as often as he could.  
  
James watched his friend closely, determining how the moon's progression affected him.   
As the full moon drew near, Remus slowly became more restless and temperamental,  
which the other Marauders now knew to be a side effect of lycanthropy. Peter seemed to  
become more edgy as well, counting down the days before his friend and dorm mate  
turned into the object of many childhood nightmares, and Sirius became more withdrawn,  
spending more time in the library than he had all year. Lily's behaviour was seen in a new light, and James couldn't help but notice every stray eye glance and sporadic disappearances when the redhead could not be found.  
  
On the day of the full moon, the four friends sat quietly together in the hospital wing.   
Remus' impending fate loomed above them all as they waited for Madam Pomfrey to lead  
him down to the Whomping Willow.  
  
When the nurse could be heard coming towards the door, Remus turned to the others.  
  
"Remember, you promised me. Don't risk approaching the wolf."  
  
"We won't forget." Peter smiled and hugged the taller boy. "Good luck." Remus looked  
expectantly at James as he returned the gesture. James nodded his assurance and clapped  
his hand on one thin shoulder.  
  
"We'll see you in the morning, mate."  
  
Remus raised an eyebrow at Sirius as he smiled mysteriously, leaning back in his chair and  
crossing his arms behind his head. "What?" Remus narrowed his eyes in a calculating  
glare, only to let up as Madam Pomfrey came through the door.  
  
"Don't I at least get a hug?" Sirius grinned wider and embraced his friend.  
  
"I'll be seeing you, Remmie."  
  
Madam Pomfrey cleared her throat and gestured towards the door. Remus smiled weakly  
at her and straightened his robes. As he passed James, he whispered, "Hog tie him if you  
have to." Before the black-haired boy could answer, the werewolf was gone. And so was  
Sirius. James groaned in exasperation and looked at Peter, who was staring intently at the  
door.  
  
"Remind me to lock up that cloak."  
  
***  
  
James spent the rest of the night tossing and turning, torn between worrying about Remus'  
transformation and wanting to find Sirius and throttle him for putting him though extra  
anxiety.   
  
Finally, just as the sun began to make an appearance, James decided to do both. He called  
out to Peter, who made a series of grunts before falling back asleep again. James rolled  
his eyes before slipping into his dressing robe and slippers. Deciding against risking going  
through the hallways and being caught by Filch, James tiptoed into the sixth year boy's  
dormitories and slipped Frank Longbottom's new Clean Sweep out from under his bed.   
Whispering a quick apology, he slipped onto the broom and flew out of the window.   
Once clear from the tower, James leaned forward and raced towards the Whomping  
Willow as fast as he could go. Two small figures were visible in the rising sunlight, curled  
up on the ground a stone's throw from the flailing branches.  
  
James clenched his jaw, a slightly sick feeling wrenching in his stomach as Sirius and Lily  
began to come into vision, the latter huddled under the former's robe as he lay his head on  
her shoulder. Sirius was shivering slightly in the cool morning breeze, drops of dew  
glittering from his cheeks and the ends of his eyelashes. James growled slightly, still  
wanting to throttle his best friend yet throwing his robe over him all the same.  
  
"James?"  
  
The boy turned towards the willow, just in time to see a familiar brown and gray mop of  
hair appear through a hole in the roots of the now stationary tree. Remus ducked quickly,  
cursing as a flock of school owls flew out of the tunnel behind him, hooting in indignation  
all the way to the owlery.  
  
"Remus!" He quickly rushed to help his friend out into the open and away from the  
Whomping Willow. Remus waved his hands away as he stood up straight and stretched  
painfully. "How are you? How do you feel?" The lycanthrope smirked slightly as his  
knees buckled and he sank to the ground.  
  
"I'm fine." He grinned wider at James' doubting look. "Really I am. I hardly hurt myself  
at all." Remus opened the tattered robe slightly to expose a patch his chest. There were many reasons why James wouldn't consider his friend "hardly hurt," but he didn't say anything as he helped Remus to his feet again.  
  
"Remus?"   
  
James turned to both slumbering students, who were now waking in the early morning  
light. Sirius propped himself up on his elbows as Lily rubbed the sleep out of her eyes.   
"You're back." Remus clenched his fists at the other boy's easy greeting and quickly  
proceeded to do what James had been itching to do all night. He leaped on Sirius' chest,  
knocking him to the ground and shaking him by the shoulders.  
  
"You bugger! I told you to keep away from the wolf! You promised!" Sirius caught his  
assailant, who quickly spent all the energy in his weakened body and began to collapse.   
Remus smiled, his eyes glittering affectionately as he was lowered onto the damp grass.   
"Crazy git." Sirius beamed back.  
  
"For one, you only made us promise not to go near the willow. For another, I didn't even  
promise that. And lastly, I wasn't in any danger. You couldn't get out of the Shrieking  
Shack even if you wanted to, werewolf or no."  
  
"Besides," Lily piped up, smiling sweetly, "You had the owls with you."  
  
"What is going on?" James' brow wrinkled in confusion. "What happened last night?"  
  
Sirius lay back down, letting Remus use him as a pillow as he looked up at his friend. "I  
read in the library that werewolves are only a threat to humans. They rather enjoy the  
company of other animals, in fact." Lily nodded in agreement, and James couldn't avoid  
noticing how her red hair flashed gold in dawn's light.  
  
"The human side is able to maintain more control over the wolf when other animals are  
present. So we filled the Shrieking Shack with barn owls -- "  
  
"Which was my idea, by the way."  
  
Lily shoot Sirius a look as he grinned triumphantly. " -- to see if it would help Remus  
during the full moon."  
  
"Course, we had to go see if it was working -- "  
  
"Which was his idea, by the way."  
  
Sirius glared at Lily, who looked on innocently before sticking her tongue out at him. " --  
so we slipped out to Hogsmeade and stole a peek through the window of the shack."  
  
"The wolf attacked the window when it smelled us, but it couldn't get past the  
enchantments. We didn't want to keep him angry, so we came back here to wait for  
Remus." Lily concluded with a flourish, a self-satisfied glint in her eyes, full with the  
knowledge that her research had been correct. "It worked, didn't it, Remus? It helped to  
have those owls there."  
  
Remus nodded contentedly, groaning as Sirius stood up and lifted him up like a child. It  
seemed like the boy would sleep at last, until two chocolate eyes opened and pinned  
themselves onto the dark blue eyes above him.  
  
"But don't you ever come near the wolf again! I don't care how many spells they placed  
on that shack, I don't want to risk cursing anyone." Sirius laughed heartily.  
  
"You worry too much, Remmie."  
  
The four friends began to walk back to the castle, meeting the headmaster and nurse along  
the way.  
  
***  
  
James and Sirius waited in Madam Pomfrey's office for Remus. The nurse promised them  
that he would be ready to join them by lunch, although both were sure that they could  
charm her into letting them in before breakfast. James shifted uncomfortably against the  
hard stone wall.  
  
"So, what did you do with my cloak?"  
  
"It's safe." James gave his friend a wary look. Sirius smiled back.  
  
"Don't worry. A house elf brought it up to the tower for me. I made her promise not to  
put it anywhere but in your trunk." James nodded in satisfaction before asking the  
question that was on his mind since he first reached the willow that morning.  
  
"How did Lily get mixed up with this? We never talked about telling her."  
  
"She's as smart as they come, that one. I reckon Lily knew that we knew before we knew  
that we knew." Sirius scratched his head in bewilderment, before shrugging it off. "When  
Lily saw me studying lycanthropy in the library, she approached me about it. Gave me all  
these great notes that she took and everything. Said she knew all that she needed to know  
about Remus."  
  
"And she won't tell anyone?"  
  
"Not a soul."  
  
James sighed in relief. "I still wish we could be there for Remus during the  
transformation."  
  
"Maybe we can." Sirius looked around slyly before leaning towards his friend. "I was  
thinking that maybe we could become animagus."  
  
"iAnimagus/i? Siri, that's practically impossible! Most people can't become  
animagus even if they try for a hundred years! Elie Goldberg told me that the first  
centaurs were animagus that got stuck as half human and half horses."  
  
"That's what Lily said. Well, not that rubbish about centaurs, but about it being  
impossible."  
  
"Well, we're both right."  
  
"No, your not! Jamie, hundreds of wizards and witches have managed it, and the only  
reason more haven't is that they've been scared off of it." Sirius grinned at the prospect of  
becoming an animagus. "Just imagine, we'd be able to turn into animals and Remus  
couldn't hurt us like that. We could be with every full moon."  
  
James closed his eyes in contemplation, imagining himself as a fox or an eagle, completely  
and utterly able to visit the wolf without fear. "We'll have to research this before we even  
try. I want to know everything I can before I try it." He opened his eyes and looked at  
Sirius. "And we can't tell Remus. Not until we know if we can do it."  
  
Sirius nodded in agreement and threw his arm around the other boy's shoulder. "Just you  
wait, Potter. This has igot/i to be my best idea yet."  
  
Something in taller boy's smile nearly caused James to reconsider.  
  
***  
  
"But what if I turn into a goldfish? What then?"  
  
James laughed at the idea and leaned closer to his friend. "Then we'll get you a nice bowl with a castle in it, Pete. Come on, it's for iRemus/i. We can at least give it a shot, can't we?"  
  
Peter pouted slightly, brushing his pale hair out of his eyes. "I'm terrible at transfiguration. And you know what Elie Goldberg says about centaurs!" Sirius buried his head in his arms before leaning back in his chair.  
  
"How can you both be so daft! We've studied them in Care of Magical Creatures, and there wasn't one word about that!" James flushed slightly before turning back to Peter.  
  
"I'll make you a deal. If you pass your transfiguration exam, we'll give it a shot. If you don't, we'll reconsider."  
  
Peter cocked his head to the side, weighing his options before nodding in agreement. James smiled winningly at the unsuspecting boy, who was completely oblivious to the drillings he would receive for the next few weeks. His smile only widened as Professor Reiner sat on a piece of dragon liver he had lovingly placed on his chair before class started.  
  
***  
  
The days before exams went by slowly for James and Sirius, who spent every free moment desperately coaching Peter in his courses. Although Remus couldn't understand why there was such a need to focus on transfiguration, he contributed in full on helping his friend get a grasp on everything from the theory to the practical. Lily wasn't told of their plans to become animagi. She had been so determined against it when Sirius had first mentioned it that he couldn't be convinced that she should be acquainted to the decision.   
  
"She'll turn us in to Dumbledore for sure!" James shook his head, unable to associate the girl with any sort of betrayal.  
  
"Lily is keeping Remus' secret. Why wouldn't she keep ours?"  
  
"The professors already iknow/i Remus' secret. If they knew ours, they'd stop us in a heartbeat. She knows that." Sirius shuddered, and for all the years he lived two houses away from the boy, James couldn't tell if it was real or in jest. "You don't know her as well as I do. She's scary. Plays by the rules and everything. Thinks too much about what could go wrong, I 'spect."  
  
No matter now many times James brought up the subject, Sirius couldn't be swayed. It bothered him slightly to keep secrets from Lily, but in the end, he knew that Sirius was probably right. And aside from the occasional game of Wizard's Chess or Exploding Snap, there wasn't much time to reconsider with exams quickly approaching. She did, however, manage to help Peter along with his studies. Lily had an exceptional way of helping the boy through topics that even Remus' careful explanations, James' detailed diagrams, and Sirius' embellished demonstrations couldn't make understood.  
  
It was a mixed blessing for Peter when he received the highest grades he had ever managed to pull off on his final examinations. All of his professors were impressed by his improvement. Professor McGonagall was especially satisfied with Peter, who had never earned enough points for Gryffindor to even begin to equal the ones he had lost.   
  
For Peter, a wonderful bout of faith in his abilities began to emerge as his marks rose above hopeless; Which was unfortunately dampened by the knowledge that he was now obligated to try harder in his classes to maintain a fair grade and to keep his promise to his Sirius and James. His only request, when implored by his friends, was that they only attempted to try and transform while they returned to Hogwarts and, more to the point, Madam Pomfrey.  
  
All four of the Marauders were uncharacteristically silent as they waited to board Hogwarts Express at the end of the term. James smiled sadly at his friends, trying his best to look optimistic to Peter, who would be visiting and aunt in Estonia for the entire vacation.  
  
"We'll owl each other every day, Pete. You'll hardly have time to miss us with all of the owls landing at your window." Peter sighed heavily and returned his smile.  
  
"That's easy for you to say. You'll be three feet from Sirius all summer. I'll be three billion feet from anyone our age who can speak English."  
  
"You could always cast a translation charm." Sirius smirked as Peter rolled his eyes.  
  
"Oh, come off it. The last time I tried that one, that Hufflepuff only spoke Mermish for three days! Flitwick took ten points for that!" James laughed at the memory.  
  
"You know Amos Diggory forgave you for that! Anyhow, he was glad to be excused from that Astronomy paper. He owes you a favour, really."   
  
Remus glanced wistfully from one friend to another. "Still, it will be awfully lonely without you three around." He shook his head mournfully. "What will I do with my time now that I have no one to keep out of trouble?"  
  
"You could always try reading. You never got a chance to do that with Siri around." James ducked the aforementioned boy's arm as he swung it at his head. Sirius grinned widely and hefted a small green bag over his shoulder.  
  
"Who says I won't be around? Me and Jamie-boy are coming to visit every chance we get, you know that don't you?" Remus sobered quickly and began to thoroughly examine his shoes. Sirius frowned slightly.   
  
"What is it?" Remus' eyes darted up briefly before looking back to his feet.  
  
"I, uh. . . " He cleared his throat in embarrassment, the tips of his ears turning slightly pink. "I'm not allowed to have visitors." He looked into his friend's faces then and smiled weakly. "They're nervous about people knowing about. . . ithat/i."  
  
"Ohhh. . . " Sirius and James shared a look. James smiled at Remus and threw an arm around his shoulder. "Then we'll just have to bring you to us." The werewolf looked at the grinning faces of his two best friends.   
  
"How are you going to do that?"   
  
"Dunno, really." Sirius checked his watch and nodded to James. "Well, times a-wasting. Guess we should be going." Both boys grabbed onto their luggage. Peter narrowed his eyes as James opened the bag on Sirius' shoulder and pulled out one of his favourite slippers.  
  
"What are you doing with that?"  
  
He didn't get an answer as Sirius grabbed the other end. Two black haired boys and one fresh new portkey suddenly disappeared from sight. Remus and Peter stared at the spot in shock, too astonished at what they had seen to even speak. Even when the contents of Severus Snape's trunk exploded through the window of Hogwarts Express.  
  
The End 


End file.
